I had suffered a small intellectual loss and was trying to get over it. I couldn't allow myslef – especially now, of all moments! – to be dragged into that melancholic Bog of Loss, that Duchy of Regret, that Realm of What Is Not – all situated at the opposite pole from the vibrant Empire of What Exists in which I was going, I strongly felt, to partake to an even larger degree soon.
I was trying quite hard, but I still felt uneasy and guilty. A whole day had passed before I realised what I was getting wrong: I wasn’t ruthless enough, I wasn’t aggressive enough in my struggle; I wasn’t fast enough, I wasn't driven enough in my full return to the Master of Speed, the Giver of Drive, the Happening God.
Because mine is the Urgent Lord of Urgent Love – and urgent must be our returns to him. (Chop chop)
PS Disregard a lot of the lyrics (written by Mike Jones, Mark Ronson’s step-father), especially the “I'm not looking for a love that lasts” line, because it's obvious that we all look for lasting excitement. I’ve chosen the song for the feel that all who have had anything to do with religion must know – this burning urgency that, like a woman, can turn you on in the middle of the night, in the middle of a prayer.
