Save water. Drag your wife under the shower.
I walk into the shower thinking something about local exorbitant taxation*. I’ve decided not to have a bath (which does wonders to my intellect, not to mention skin, but I fear the smoothly and quietly operating German Bosch thing, which deals with local bath water, can run up the bill as fast as a Bayerische Motoren Werke AG product can dash down eine Autobahn; and we’ve got a crisis in progress, in case you haven’t noticed) so I turn on a neat and – allegedly - economical British-designed, Chinese-made, Polish**-maintained electrical contraption that is supposed to be simple and just fine for moderate, occasional use*** - and I wait for warm water. And I wait. The cold water is chilling out my feet, so I change the settings. And I wait. And I wait. The bill is growing at a speed that makes me hot. And I still wait. And I wait. Then I swear, change the settings and wait. And I wait. Next I shout Scheiße! when a sudden gush of hot water scalds my… never mind. And I think: “Someone, bitte, get the Germans!!
*don’t worry: I’ve already covered my truthfulness. (And I DON’T)
**in most likelihood.
***not that I like to walk around dirty, it’s just that I’m moderate in the use of water, but I use lots of cheap deodorant to make up.... (kidding; I use bloody expensive eau de Köln).
Hugo Boss
(not necessarily modelling here; I tell you what: if German men are not stunning I don't know what... It will come to punches between them and me at some point over the E.U., but let the more handsome not win, bitte)
