I place my stove-top espresso bambino* - oh! the morning espresso...** - on the burner, but just then the flame gives out its last breath. I remember that half an hour earlier I put the heating on and the pay-as-you-go gas meter demands a top-up - and I am penniless.
I give out a groan, see the trade-off I unwittingly made, nearly break down in tears... then slowly calm down (comforted by the co-tenants, covered in a blanket and hugged by the landlady -.. sorry, just a silly vision) and gradually (encouraged by my mom; someone had got hold of her on the phone from Poland) I make a decision to take it like a man.
Then I think: how come so many of us understand and accept irrevocable consequences of our actions in so many other walks of life (and death), but not when it comes to roting (or burning) in Hell?
Perhaps this anomaly means that they silently acknowledge that the Universe is after all personal, not systemic; and it is governed by someone rather than by a law; and that this Someone has the power to overrule the hard rules governing coffee and radiators, warmth and cold, life and death? The big question then is: can persons make irrevocable decisions regarding a relationship?
*I have a thing about Italian coffe, so scusi the terms of endearment; besides, in fact there is only one Maker of coffee.
**you know what? The other day I picked up a copy of Dante's C. (I rarely read and never finish books) in the local library, read about Picarda Donati and put the book away on the shelf. But now I've decided to make an effort and sift through the text to find a mention of an Italian morning espresso in Paradiso.
