By Jove raping Europe!
What sly propaganda! I have just caught a glimpse of a booklet entitled "How the E.U. works" sitting, as if nothing has happened over the last few years, on a shelf of a bookcase in Caridff Cenral Library. It's accompanied by other materials with titles such as: "The E.U.: What's in it for me? (A no-nonsense guide to what the E.U. delivers", "One currency for one Europe" (one should imagine 'Euro' is taboo now for the PID in Brussels, but it seems the policy they've adopted is 'shock 'em, numb 'em and plough forward!') and the like.
Surely, the original title was “How it bloody doesn’t work”! But those thieving, lying bastards from Brussels must have sent in the dead of the night a junior clerk from their Propaganda & Indoctrination Directorate to tinker with the printing press in order to distort the truth and prolong the deception of naïve children and distressed widows (their brazen tricks stopped having any effect on anyone else a long time ago).
But then, we know only too well that they have no shame. They are the kind of guys that can look straight into the eyes of a small, innocent schoolchild and tell them with an benevolent smile: “Everything’s hanky-dory in Brussels, things run jolly well and all member states hold hands in a circle, go round and sing Ode to Joy. A really happy ship, it is… what?
...oh, yes - since you ask and insist on phrasing it like this: it is sinking right now, making a few counties bankrupt in the process and forcing everyone to pay through the nose for a series of failed stupid experiments conducted recklessly over the last few decades, despite clear and well-founded advice on the part of numerous experts, knowledgeable politicians, well-informed voters, including Herr Obsendorf… no… no - why should we change tack? It’s a happy ship, after all. Every booklet and leaflet printed by our Directoriate will tell you so! Now, go and play, boy!”
I start to walk away, but something makes me turn my head to take one more look at the whole collection, before some clued-up voter bins the whole lot (which is sure to happen, isn't it?) - and I notice an outcrop of small posters one of the sides of the propagandist bookcase. Their blue background punched with a sprinkling of golden stars works on me like a Communist rag on a Franco-supporting bull. Somehow I manage to overcome a strong impulse to reach for my gun and decide to read the thing instead: Dathlu Diwrnod Ewrop, Ymunwch a ni yn lanisad, Canolfan wybodaeth Europe Direct Caerdydd gyda David Hughes. I understand nothing (except Europe Direct, which - really - I don't understand either), so I go online (the computer was sooo slow; this library must ugently get its act together - internet-wise.) to check what it's all about* and can't believe my eyes:
"Celebrate Europe Day
Join us for the launch of the Europe Direct Information Centre, Cardiff with David Hughes, Head of the European Commission in Wales."
Celebrate?? So instead of apologising to the people of Wales for the support given to a costly, misconceived, ruinous venture, partly for the short-term perks, partly out of spite toward the English (yes, I realise that there are some ancient grudges involved, but who with any dose of common sense would choose stiff German control-freaks over quite relaxed English conquerors? As a Pole, I know only too well that you can trust the English to desert you when it suits them, but I also know that the Germans are worse - you can trust them never willingly to desert you, unless they’re pressed by the Russians).
And now this chap will come here to preach a humbug religion to susceptible kids and confused students and distressed widows.
You know what? I will go to this meeting to join the celebrations. And I will pulverise the guy.
*not quite true: the other side of the leaflet was in English, but I wanted to add some suspence (and I did look up the library's website; this time round it worked perfectly; besides, I shouldn't grumble about the speed of the local internet - I usually keep a score of open windows and listen to three things at the same time).
top photo: www.ecurry.com
European Union President Herman Van Rompuy (2nd L Front) attends a ceremony to present the new EU dress to the statue of Manneken Pis in Brussels, Belgium, June 23, 2010. Belgium will hold EU Presidency from July 1. (Xinhua/Wang Xiaojun)
*not quite true: the other side of the leaflet was in English, but I wanted to add some suspence (and I did look up the library's website; this time round it worked perfectly; besides, I shouldn't grumble about the speed of the local internet - I usually keep a score of open windows and listen to three things at the same time).
top photo: www.ecurry.com
